


Ficlet freakshow

by orphan_account



Category: Game Grumps, Starbomb (Band), jacksepticeye, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Blood, Boys Kissing, Confession, Death, Different Dimensions, Drowning, F/M, Fluff, Funeral, Gen, Kissing, M/M, Paper Cut, Pokemon GO - Freeform, Power Outage, Robbery, Sick Dan, Skinny Dipping, Starbomb - Freeform, amusement park date, awww, dan gets spooked, dimension scrambler, editing mistakes, egobang undertones, frustraded dan, idfk, keeping the drawing, lip ring, mom mode, on the radio!, pet play undertones, polybomb undertones?, ross shenanigans, rubbercommanderbang, rubberdoop, scared ross, septiplier undertones, sick holly, sleeping, teaching dan to draw, tutor arin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-19
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-07-25 11:05:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 13,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7530205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A log of all my requests I've gotten on my tumblr. Will update tags as needed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Shup Up, Will You?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @bluebelladon on tumblr: wanted ross being kissed by Daniel to shut up.

"I wish it would just work." Ross smacks the side of his computer in a last ditch effort for something to kick and fix itself. No avail. The screen is stuck on the same frame of his Gameoverse character frozen mid stride on Flash. 

Ross lets out a loud groan. He really doesn't want to have to redo every fucking thing he just did. He may save every five seconds, but losing five seconds of an animation puts anyone days behind schedule. 

"Ross, what's wrong?" A hand is suddenly on Ross' shoulder. A familiar one paired with a familiar soft voice.

"I...I don't know Dan," Ross says, turning in his chair. "This fucking computer won't work and I'm freaking out that I'll lose all my work."

Dan eyes the screen. "Yikes."

Ross sighs heavily, turning back around. "Yeah, yikes."

Dan stands over Ross' shoulder, crossing his arms, brows furrowed. He watches his friend click and click eventually giving up and pushing past Dan with tears brimming his eyes.

Dan follows him.

"Barry, hey Barry." Dan pauses long enough to stop at Barry's desk. He takes his headphones off and lets them rest around his neck. 

"'Sup?" Barry asks.

"Can you see if you can salvage anything from Ross' computer, it's frozen. I gotta go do something real quick." Without waiting for a reply, Dan scurries off to the room Ross ran into.

Dan opens the door to the grump room and sees Ross' tuft of hair poking up from the back of the couch. He can also hear the sniffles coming from there too.

"Ross? Buddy?" Dan asks quietly. Ross turns around, looking at Dan for all of a second before turning back around in a huff. 

Dan edges forward, not knowing if he's wanted in here. He takes slow steps to his friend. When Ross comes into view, Dan can see him wiping his eye with the back of his hand.

"Ross?" Dan asks again. He sits down next to him. Ross doesn't answer for a good few minutes, and they both sit in silence, waiting for one another to talk.

"Barry's checking out your computer," Dan finally says, not completely sure if what he just said was the truth. Ross just scoffs.

"He won't be able to fix the damn thing," he says, bitter. "It's broken. Everything's probably corrupted."

"I don't think that's true," Dan says. "We can get everything fixed if you just--"

Ross interrupts him as if he were never talking. "I've worked so hard on this project Dan. I wanted it to work out and I do this eight hours a day. Eight hours a day for a year and a half and it's all gone. I bet it's all fucking gone."

"Ross-"

"Everyone's already been hounding me about Gameoverse anyway. When is it gonna be done? Where's the new season? Why is it taking so long? I'm trying dammit! I am."

"Ross--"

"And then I was almost done with this episode and it freezes and everything is just gone! I bet it's all gone! And no one but me will care."

"Ross..."

"Well fuck, I mean it's not like I would've made money on it anyway because YouTube's algorithm is so fucked up anyway. I mean, like, it's so fu--"

Ross is cut off himself by a pair of lips against his. Immediately, his frustration and anger begin to melt. When Danny pulls away, he smiles. That fuckin smile that always ends up making Ross' knees shake.

"You need to hush. Barry's fixing it. Everything will be fine." Danny rustles Ross' hair. "Okay?"

Ross can't help but smile back. "Okay."


	2. Catch 'Em All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @bluebelladon. It's about pokemon go.

Ever since Pokemon Go came out, Dan had gone a little nuts.

He had never really noticed Pokemon's existence before the mobile game was released. He acknowledged it, respected it, appreciated it, but that was all.

At first, no one wanted to say anything.

Dan came in the first day sporting an Ash Ketchum hat. Everyone knew it, but they didn't point it out. Even when Dan yelled "THERE'S A JIGGLYPUFF IN HERE" from the bathroom. It was more of an ongoing joke than a real concern.

The second day, Dan strode through the door gracefully, tripping on his untied shoelaces and face planting the wood floor. His nose was bleeding when he stood up, and yet he still locked on his phone and continued his journey for a Charizard. 

The third day, Arin decided to speak up when Dan literally tried to stop in the middle of a recording to go outside and catch a Pidgey.

"First," Arin said, "Pidgeys aren't even rare. Like at all. Second, dude, what is your obsession with this game?"

Dan only grinned back like a fool. "It's so damn fun Arin. I'm an old man in the midst of virtual reality. I'm having fun!"

"Well, have fun later. We're recording."

Upon the fourth day, everyone decided it was time for an intervention. Dan was late for work. He had caught sight of a Mewtwo and could not let that go. A stampede of people, including him went to catch it, but someone got to it before him. He got lost on the way back to the office.

Dan entered the office, and went to his station on the couch. He wrapped himself up in his blanket and slipped his headphones on. Then he threw his blanket over himself and went quiet. 

Everyone shared mutual confused looks. Barry stood up from his desk and walked over to Dan.

"Danny?" Barry asked. No answer. "Dan, what are you doing?"

A simple whisper from underneath the blanket.

"Gotta catch 'em all."


	3. Late Night Swim

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @lovelyflowerqueen on tumblr: ar and suze go skinny dippin

Arin stares nervously at the water that had to be less than twenty degrees right now. 

Suzy is slipping around in the water like a fricken' mermaid. "It's not even that cold," she says, hair sticking to her forehead and shoulders. She looks oddly goddess-like, kicking her feet and pumping her arms in a rhythmic motion to stay afloat.

"It's a lake at nighttime Suze, it looks freezing," Arin says as stands at the edge of the pier in his boxers. It isn't even really the fact of the temperature of the water. He had never in his life gone skinny dipping. At the house, when Suzy offered, the proposition seemed amusing. But now, it just felt awkward.

At least to Arin.

"It isn't. Come on, I'll warm you up." Suzy dunks her head in the water and pops back up moments later, a huge smile on her face. It takes a lot to make Suzy self conscious, and skinny dipping is no exception. Her teeth are a stark white compared to the dark colors around him.

In the dark, the lake water looks black, muted down from blue to gray in the dead of night. Arin doesn't want to go in.

But his wife is right there. Naked. Swimming. Smiling. Beckoning to her husband like a siren beckoning to a pirate ship. Her voice is small and sexy, and her eyes are hypnotizing.

How can he refuse?

"Alright Suzy, for you. Only for you," Arin says. He peels off his boxers, leaving them to the side of the pier with the rest of their clothes. He takes a step back. Two. Three.

"CANNON BALL!"


	4. Ross Shenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @lovelyflowerqueen on tumblr: ross pulls some pranks during a hot power outage.

Hot. Sticky. Dark. Everyone's trudging around looking for whatever work they can do as the power is being fixed. 

Oh, also it's raining nails and hammers outside. So no one can leave even if they wanted to. Which they do want to, very badly. 

Perfect for some shenanigans. 

"Hey Arin, can I go into the spare room for some battery powered fans or something?" Dan asks, fanning himself with a stack of papers. Poor guy, doesn't even get the benefit of sweating. He is panting like a dog, hair pulled into a tight bun. 

Arin shakes his head. "There's nothing in there. Suzy already checked." Arin is completely drenched in sweat. His pit stains have almost connected at his chest and his forehead is dripping. His hair is up too. 

Dan groans loudly. Even him, the person who complains about being cold in the summer with a leather jacket on, has given into the heat. He has tossed his blanket to the side, letting sit in a crumpled heap, awaiting Dan's return. 

"I feel like I'm going to have a stroke," Ross says, passing a sulking Barry on the way to the fridge. He opens it, and pulls out a water, downing more than half of it in one swift gulp. He looks at the remaining liquid, pondering. "I want to pour this on myself."

"Pour it on me while you're at it," Barry says, feeling exerted from saying that one sentence. God how he wishes he was in a cooler place right now. Maybe Antarctica?

Ross shrugs, a sly smile spreading. He pours the rest of the bottle down the back of Barry's shirt. Barry responds by shrieking loud enough to break the sound barrier as he flies from his spot on the table. He gives Ross a murderous look as the water drips to the floor. Everyone, including Ross, laughs. 

"I didn't mean literally!" Barry exclaims. 

"Feels good though, right?" Ross asks, tossing the empty bottle away and grabbing a new one. Barry opens his mouth to say something, but closes it, in a harumph because the cold of the water did help a little. Barry slides back into his seat at the table without another word.

"Hey Ross, toss me a bottle will you?" Suzy asks, spread out like a starfish on one of the bean bags. Ross does so, walking over to the grump room. 

"Dude, do you have a death wish? It's hot as hell in there." Dan actually looks concerned for Ross as he grabs the handle of the door.

"I might as well get something done, and I can't do it in here where you all sound like really old dogs. If I die, Arin gets my drawing tablet. See ya." Ross gives a salute, opening the door and walking in.

The heat in here is absolutely stifling. It feels like a ten thousand layer fur coat. But, it's quiet, something he wasn't getting in the general office. 

Plus, he wanted to wait for everyone to fall asleep so he could pull some shenanigans. The rain continues to pour outside, splattering against the windows, so Ross knows everyone will have to pull an all nighter here. Hot. Sticky. Dark. Getting darker with the setting sun. 

Heh.

~~~

Dan is laying sprawled out on the couch, drifting in and out of sleep. The kind of sleep that is technically asleep, yet you still can perceive the outside world. 

So when Dan hears his name being called, he doesn't know whether it's in his dream or in the real world. 

Dan opens his eyes just enough to make out the three figures strewn about the office. Barry is slumped over at the table, awaiting to wake up to a horrible back cramp. Suzy is on one of the bean bags, still spread out to get as much air as possible. And Arin is on the other, dead asleep. His snoring is easily heard, even from across the room. No one is awake enough to call his name. It must've been a dream. So he lets his eyes droop shut and drfit back off to sleepytime junction once more.

But then he hears it again.

This time, Dan is more awake. He sits up, the dark mixed with the pouring rain outside suddenly making him a little nervous. Dan squints to see his coworkers, just to make sure none of them were doing it. Maybe the called his name in their sleep? 

His eyes anxiously shifted from Barry to Suzy to Arin, Barry, Suzy, Arin, Barry, Suzy--

"Dan."

Dan froze. That definitely was not a dream. And it definitely was not being said by his friends. 

Dan stood up from the couch, brain freaking the fuck out while it tried to figure out what is calling his name. 

"The bathroom, Dan," it calls. Dan swallows, slowly heading to the bathroom. The dark gets to him, shadows jumping here and there, mysterious sounds of creaking and moaning. Maybe it's the building settling?

Dan makes it to the bathroom. He twists the handle, opening the door slowly. His heart is beating almost out of his chest.

"Hello?" Dan asks dumbly. He's in the bathroom now, staring at a dark, human sized figure in the middle of the room. It jumps forward.

"HA!" 

Dan then screams louder than Barry did earlier, reaching for the light instinctively. It doesn't turn on. No power. Dan stands there, shaking, waiting for whatever it is to eat him or kill him or whatever, but he stops. 

He hears laughing. A distinct laugh that can only belong to--

"Goddamnit Ross," Dan says, shoving him before walking away. "Give me a fuckin heart attack why don't you."

"Sorry," Ross replies in the middle of his giggle fit. "It's too fun to not mess with you."

Shenanigans. Who else but Ross?


	5. Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anon request on tumblr: dan falls asleep and arin admires him

"Lemme know when you're ready," Arin said, walking into the grump room. "Just come in whenever."

Dan gave a haphazard thumbs up and a nod. As soon as the door to the grump room shut, Dan's head fell back against the couch, falling immediately asleep. Two days of no sleep and Monster energy drinks can really take a toll on a guy. 

"Dan?" Suzy called from her spot at the table. She was munching on a popsicle, and just so happened to notice Dan's shift from awake to asleep. "You awake?"

Suzy's question was met with a gentle snoring. She couldn't help but smile. "Poor guy," she mumbled. She knew about him having to pull two all nighters in a row. She didn't blame him for falling asleep.

~~

Arin sat in the grump room for near ten minutes as he waited for Dan to come in. When he didn't, he decided to investigate. Maybe he was eating? Or talking to someone? Arin got up off the couch, confused and a little worried. He went into the general office. 

"Dan?" He asked. Arin was answered with Suzy pointing a finger over at the limp Dan that had fallen dead asleep on the couch. His leg was hanging off of the side, and his hands rested Snow White style in the middle of his chest. 

Arin let out a small laugh, plopping into the last cushion next to Dan, hoping the disturbance would wake him. Dan only stirred, his foot making direct contact with Arin's ribs as he turned on his side.

Arin sighed, pulling out his phone to check his email while he gave Dan a chance to rest. 

But for some reason, Arin just couldn't focus on his emails. Every time he opened one and started to read it, he was drawn to the sound of Dan's quiet snoring and level breathing. Don't get him wrong, he tried to ignore it, but something about the way Dan was laying made it impossible for Arin to focus.

Arin eventually stuck his phone back in his pocket and gave Dan a good long look. He was still in a coma, breathing through his nose. Dan never really snored, but the way his neck was laying on the arm of the couch made it to where he was snoring the tiniest bit. It was nothing compared to Brian. In fact, it was a little cute.

Arin couldn't help but stare at his friend. He was so serene, finally getting just a little nap after however long of not even seeing his own bed, let alone sleeping in it. He looked younger, softer, calmer than he had in days. His hands were lazily draped over his chest, rising up and down steadily with every breath. With one leg hanging off the side of the couch, and the other pressing into Arin's hip, there was something endearing about the way he looked. 

He looked natural, human, so plainly Dan, that Arin couldn't look away. Dan looked, in short, absolutely adorable. 

Arin wished he could let Dan sleep all day, but sadly, there was work to be done. Arin reached over and shook Dan's shoulder a little. Dan immediately woke.

"What, I'm awake!" He said, sitting straight up. He yawned, stretching out his arms and back before standing. "What took you so long dude, we have to record." Dan gave a playful wink to Arin before walking into the grump room.

Arin just shook his head, following suit.


	6. Getting Better

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @sweetiefiend on tumblr: wanted arin tutoring dan, dan threw away his drawing but arin kept it.

Dan held the pencil in his hand as tight has he could manage as he poised it over the paper. He concentrated with all his might, imagining in his head what he wanted to draw. Simple. Just a flower. That shouldn't be too hard, right?

He started with the main circle the petals would stem off of. Then he just went from there, trusting that his hand would be connected enough to his brain so he could draw what he imagined. That isn't quite what happened.

What Dan ended up with was a sorry excuse for a sunflower. A third grader could've done it better. He sighed in frustration and shoved the drawing materials over at Arin, who had become a makeshift tutor. Arin took a look at the picture Dan had drawn as if it were a puzzle that needed solving. He eyed it up, down, and sideways like it was some kind of masterpiece. More like disaster piece.

"You're definitely getting better dude," Arin commented, holding Dan's drawing up to the light.

Dan rolled his eyes. "Yeah, totally. It's a real Mona Lisa." He snatched it from Arin's hands. "Look at this thing. It's awful."

Arin only shook his head, tutor hat falling back in place. "No, you're getting better. Your lines are smoother and it has a more definite shape. And you didn't even sketch it."

Dan looked up from his drawing. "Sketch it?"

"Yeah. You can sketch it first and then go over it, and that'll make it even better."

Dan gave an exaggerated groan, leaning back in his chair. "I have to draw things twice now? As if it weren't hard enough!"

Arin gave a small laugh, sliding the drawing tools back over to Dan. "You wanna try again?"

Dan nodded, grabbing the pencil again. He looked at the empty page, brows furrowing as he tried to think of what to draw. Think of something simple, he told himself. Something he's sure he would be able to draw. Something he'd seen every day. Something he couldn't possibly draw incorrectly. 

His eyes drifted over the nearby wall, covered in stickers. One of those stickers being his own grump head. There. That had to be something he could draw. He looked at it all the time, every time he came into work. Surely he could draw something as simple as a grump head. Arin must've followed Dan's gaze, because he gave Dan a smack on the shoulder.

"Yeah dude, draw a grump head. Those are super easy." Dan looked over at Arin, a small smile on his face. Yeah. Super easy. Says the guy who designed them.

"Gimme a second." 

Arin nodded, determined to help Dan accomplish his dream of being able to draw. Even if Dan was stubborn about his statements of not being able to draw anything at all. Even if it took all night to get a picture out of him.

Dan asked for a second. That second turned into minutes. Those minutes turned into an hour. Then two. Then two and a half. Dan struggled with trying to get it right. He held the pencil carefully and drew as steady as possible. And still, Arin said nothing. He sat. He gave pointers. He helped Dan calm down when he was frustrated so he could continue. Ross and Suzy went home and still, Arin stayed to help his friend. 

And finally, just as the sun was starting to dip below the horizon, Dan finished his drawing.

Arin held his hand out. "Can I see it?"

Dan held the paper close to him, hesitant. After a second though, he handed it over. Arin took it and looked at it carefully.

It was a picture of Dan and Arin's grump heads surrounded in little stars and hearts. It was crude, simple, and wobbly. But knowing it was something Dan drew was endearing and, honestly really cute. Arin felt like a proud parent, ready to pin the drawing on the fridge. He smiled at the picture, then up at Dan.

"I like it. It's cool. You're getting better."

Dan rolled his eyes, taking the drawing back in his own hands. "Don't lie to me. Someone like you could do better in your sleep." He stared at the page, shifting his feet. He felt like a kid. Attempting to draw and immediately expecting to be as good as someone who'd been drawing for twenty years, then being embarrassed when said artist tried to help. He knew in the back of his mind that Arin was giving genuine praise, but he still felt as if he were being patronized.

"You are improving Dan, don't deny it." Arin got up from the chair, stretching his limbs and cracking his back. He yawned. "Keep it somewhere so you can look at it when you get even better. Like a before and after."

Dan gripped the edges of the drawing. He didn't want to keep it. It looked like trash. That's where this stupid drawing belonged. The garbage. Dan crumpled it up, standing from his chair and slamming into the can. 

"Face it Arin, I can't draw. It's a skill I don't have." Dan grabbed his keys from the table. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Arin is left there, standing alone in the office as the door shuts behind Dan. Arin sighed, shaking his head at Dan's disappointment. He really was getting good at drawing. He just expected to be better by now, which just doesn't happen as fast as he wanted it to. It took Arin his whole life, and he still wasn't at the level he wanted to be at. Arin wanted to keep trying though. He wasn't giving up on Dan just yet.

Speaking of.

Arin took quiet steps toward the trash bin where Dan had thrown his crumpled drawing. Looking down in the can, he saw it there, in a little ball next to a discarded coffee cup. The edge of a star poked out from one of the folds in the paper. He reached down a hand into the can, grabbing it before the coffee drops got to it.

Arin opened it up and straightened it as much as he could. The drawing of the two grump heads surrounded by stars and hearts still made Arin's own heart jump. Why, he didn't know. But it did. He smiled. 

Arin slid his phone out of his back pocket, taking the case off of it. He then folded the paper up until it was small enough to fit on the back of his phone. Then he put his case back on over it, so the drawing would always be with him. A memory of the day or something. It almost felt like stealing somehow. Although Arin wasn't stealing from anything other than his own trash can, he still felt like he was doing something wrong. Dan didn't want this drawing. In fact, he probably hated it. So why exactly was Arin so fond of it?

No idea. But he was keeping it anyway.

***

It was weeks later. Arin was still trying to tutor Dan in the art of...art. Dan still had trouble, but he was definitely getting better. He drew a unicorn the other day. So to celebrate, Arin wanted to take everyone out to eat. Well, he actually just wanted to take everyone out to eat, but giving the outing a reason like that was funny to him. So they all went. He and Dan and Ross and Suzy and Brian and Kev and Barry. Jack was busy and Vernon had babysitting duty (cats), and Brent just didn't want to go. So the rest of them went to an old favorite restaurant together.

Nothing remarkable happened at the dinner. The staff was nice, the food was good, the jokes were funny. Everyone had a good time. It was when Dan and Arin were walking to the car. Suze and Arin had decided to carpool with Barry and Dan, so they all were riding home together. 

On the way to the car though, Arin had misread the integrity of the parking lot. He hulk stomped right into a pot hole, his phone flying right out of his hands. It slammed against the ground. The case not only flew off, the battery came out too. 

"Fuck," Arin said, leaning down to pick his scattered phone pieces up. Dan helped. He grabbed the case of Arin's phone and a folded up paper. Dan straightened, looking at it curiously.

"What's this?" Dan asked. He knew it was probably none of his business, but his wonder got the best of him. Arin shrugged in response.

"You can open it."

Dan hesitated just a second before unfolding it. The paper had been previously crumpled, it seems. But when he opened it fully, he couldn't really believe what he saw.

It was his drawing of he and Arin's grump heads, surrounded in little stars and hearts. 

"You kept my drawing?" Dan asked, touched. Arin nodded, putting his phone back together. The screen hadn't been cracked, thankfully, but that wasn't really what Arin was focused on. He could see the look in Dan's eyes as he stared at the drawing. He almost looked like he was going to cry where he stood.

"Aw man...Arin. I can't believe...aw..." Dan couldn't finish his sentences. He was so surprised that Arin actually kept it. Not only kept it, but kept it close to him. Arin couldn't help but smile.

"I told you that you were getting better."


	7. Stay With Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by froggiekirby10 on tumblr: #Markdrownstoeverything gets too literal.

"Remind me again why we're doing this?" Jack asked as he set up the app from Mark's phone. The wind was strong today, whipping Jack's green mess into a halo around his head. Mark's hair was in the same predicament, but he didn't seem to care as he slipped on a red t-shirt and swimming shorts. 

"I'll remind you why I'm doing this," he said. "No reason. I'm bored and having fun with the app."

True that. Mark had been using musical.ly nonstop since the day he'd downloaded it. Jack had only been in L.A. for three days and most of those three days had been filled with Mark's adventures with the app. Jack personally didn't find the charm in it, it was just a singing app. But Mark liked it and asked for help from him, so who was he to deny?

"Get in the pool already. It's hotter than the devil's asshole out here." Even Jack, who barely ever sweated, was starting to feel a stickiness in his pits. 

Mark rolled his eyes. "Sorry your pale Irish ass can't handle the heat."

Jack held the phone over the surface of the water. "Would be a shame if your phone got wet."

Mark crossed his arms. "I dare you."

Jack smiled, pulling the phone back to safety. They both knew he wouldn't do something like that. Jack just stuck his tongue out. Mark did it back, and continued getting ready for this silly little video.

"Can we hurry up already? I'm about to piss myself." Jack shifted from foot to foot, trying not to let the floodgates open onto Mark's back porch. He had needed to go to the bathroom for a good while. He just couldn't really find the right time to. First he had to run to the store, then he cooked some breakfast, and since then, he and Mark had been filming all kinds of videos. He even had to run over to the grump space and record with Arin and Barry. He hadn't gotten a chance to use the pot. And he really needed to soon, or else he'd need a new pair of jeans.

Mark seemed to notice this, giving Jack a curious look. "Do you...uh..you alright?"

Jack really couldn't hold himself anymore. He set Mark's phone down on a nearby chair and half walked half ran inside. "I actually have to go to the bathroom can I use yours thanks!"

Mark watched Jack do the penguin shuffle into his house until he turned a corner. Mark only laughed to himself, grabbing his phone off the chair. He opened twitter and quickly made a taunting tweet.

'Looks like Jack isn't as tough as he seems. Can't even hold his bladder!'

It was less than two minutes before he was notified of a response.

'At least my bathroom isn't filthy as yours!'

Mark rolled his eyes at the response, exiting to his feed and browsing twitter while he waited. He was pacing around the pool as he scrolled, mindlessly liking and retweeting whatever suited his fancy. 

He paced around the edge of the pool for a good five minutes. What was Jack doing in there, redecorating the place? Just as Mark set his phone back down, ready to go find out, he felt himself misstep. His foot hit water instead of solid ground.

Half a scream left Mark's lips as he fell face forward into the cement, hitting his head. He tried to stop himself with his hands, but he didn't make in time. He was filled with an immeasurable pain before he passed out from the impact.

~~

Jack let out all he had been keeping in for the past 18 hours, glad to have gotten that out of his system. It was the longest wizz he had ever taken. He was surprised that his peanut bladder could hold so much. 

Before he went back outside though, he did his best to try and fix his hair. The wind was really intense today and completely made a mess of Jack's do. He swiped it to the side as much as he could, but eventually gave up. Mark was waiting for him.

Jack walked out to the porch, noticing that Mark wasn't there anymore. He was about to call his name when he noticed that Mark was floating face down in the pool. 

Jack knew immediately that this wasn't for the video. This wasn't right. 

"MARK!" Jack jumped into the pool, getting to Mark and flipping him over as fast as he could manage. Blood gushed from a wound in the middle of his forehead, his glasses were gone, his lips were blue, and he wasn't breathing.

Oh god. Oh god oh god oh god.

Jack could feel tears jumping into his eyes. No. This couldn't be happening. Oh god please no. Mark wake up.

Jack held Mark's head above water, doing his best to give him mouth to mouth. Jack wasn't trained in this, oh god how he wished he was. 

"Fuck, fuck fuck fuck!" Mark wasn't moving. He still wasn't breathing. 

Jack dragged Mark over the edge of the pool, pulling him out onto the cement. He did his best to do CPR and mouth to mouth one after the other. Neither seemed to help. Oh god.

Jack scrambled to Mark's phone sitting on the chair. He dialed 911, knowing his own phone was probably water logged because of the pool. It was too long before they finally picked up.

"L.A.P.D what is your emergency?"

Jack found himself unable to speak. Was he really about to say this? Was this really happening? To him? To Mark? Everything was happening so fast. Too fast. It was spinning. Everything was spinning. All he could do was sob.

"Hello?" The operator asked. Jack tried to breathe. He needed help. He needed to get help for Mark who wasn't breathing. Who fell in the pool while Jack was doing his fucking hair.

"Uh, m-my friend. He...he hit his head and f-ell in the pool and he...he isn't breathing he isn't-" Jack swallowed. "He isn't moving and he's bleeding and I don't know how to do CPR please send someone please!"

"Okay sir, can you confirm the address for me please, I'll get paramedics out there as soon as I can."

Jack managed to spit out the address. He could barely breathe himself. They wouldn't get there fast enough. "Is there anything I c-can do, please help me!"

There was a pause from the operator's side. "Sir, you said he wasn't breathing?"

Jack nearly gagged at the thought. "No! He isn't!"

"Okay, I'm going to need you to go and check his pulse for me. Can you do that?"

Jack nodded. "Mmhm." He went over to Mark and pressed his fingers to Mark's neck. After a second or two of feeling around, Jack felt a faint beating under his fingertips. Relief washed over Jack like a wave.

"It's there!" Jack exclaimed. "You can still save him! Can you save him please, please save him!"

"We will do everything in our power. Medics are on their way, you just make sure that pulse stays there okay? And don't hang up."

Jack stared at his friend. He was so still. So unnatural. The blood flowing out of the cut in his forehead slowed. Bad sign. Bad sign. 

"Hurry please!" Jack screamed into the phone. He knew that the operator couldn't control the speed of the medics, but he didn't know what else to do. "He's dying!"

"They're hurrying sir, just stay with him."

Jack set the phone on the ground next to him. Damn operator wasn't doing anything!

"Mark," Jack said. He grabbed Mark's hand and held it as tight as he could. It was cold. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered, letting his head fall forward onto Mark's unmoving chest. He wept. I'm sorry Mark. I'm so, so sorry.

~

There was a stretcher. A body bag. A notation of the time of death. Everything was blurry. Questions were asked. Jack barely answered them. He only stared at his fingers, which had felt the last beat of Mark's heart. And Jack couldn't save him.

That's all he could think. Selfish thought it may have been. 

I couldn't save him.


	8. Scared, Ross?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @confusedsnail on tumblr: ross, holly, and dan go on a date together.

Woah, that one is tall.

So is that one. Oh wow.

They're all so tall.

Ross feels his stomach doing cartwheels as his eyes travel up the length of the first hill of the rollercoaster he, Holly, and Dan are planning to ride. It's tall. So tall that it almost reaches the clouds like it would in a cartoon. Ross can feel his knees start to shake.

Dan slaps Ross' shoulder. "Getting cold feet?"

Ross tries to swallow the sand in his mouth, and forces himself to stop staring at the intimidating ride. He shrugs. "No, course not."

Holly leans over and plants a quick kiss on Ross' cheek. "It's okay to be scared."

"I am not scared!"

Danny and Holly both roll their eyes at the same time. "He's scared."

Ross feels the sweat collecting on the back of his neck and the middle of his palms. He wipes his hands on his pants and tries to calm himself. He ponders how much shit he would get if he backs out right now, as the three are just ten people behind the gate. He wonders if he could just let Holly and Dan go without him because, yes, he is scared. He's on the brink of tears he's so scared. Ross doesn't know if the height of the ride is the thing scaring him, or the movies he's seen about rides breaking down, or just the fact that he'll be helpless when he's strapped in the seat, but he's terrified. 

But, he did agree to come with Dan and Holly. They were so excited. They still are. Dan is shifting on his feet back and forth, eagerly looking ahead. Holly is trying to see over the people in front of them, her hair bobbing up and down with every hop. All three are a hive of nerves, with Ross the most anxious.

"So fuckin hyped dude," Dan says, rubbing his hands together. He turns to Holly. "You wanna ride the front car? We'll be able to choose if we get up to the gate this next go-round."

Ross can physically feel his heart skipping a beat at that thought. He shakes his head. "No I think being near the back is--is fine with me."

Dan mocks a pouting face. "Come ooooooon. We've been waiting for two hours!" He extends a hand over to Holly. "Do you agree?"

Holly looks over at Ross, her face one of sympathy. She locks fingers with him, watching Dan's arm fall to his side in disappointment. "Sorry Dan," she says. "We can just ride in the middle, okay?"

Dan gives an exaggerated sigh. "Fiiiiiiiine." He ruffles Ross' hair. "Only cuz I love you."

Ross sticks his tongue out.

~  
"Can we go again??" 

So, Ross makes it out of the roller coaster alive. He is practically jumping up and down with adrenaline. "I want to go again!"

Dan and Holly, however, made it out with less enthusiasm. Holly's hair has practically turned white, and Dan looks as if he's about to hurl up his breakfast.

"Maybe we could not do that," Holly says, leading the three to a nearby table. She almost falls into the bench, trying to steady her vision. 

Dan does the same. That ride was so full of loops and twists and turns that Dan felt like he was going to fly out of his seat. He was grateful when it was over.

Ross, however, has had a complete change of heart. The ride he had been so afraid of turned out to be incredibly fun. He wants to go on it again. And a third time. Can man actually fall in love with an amusement park ride? It seems that way. 

"To think you were scared of going on that thing." Dan shakes his head at Ross, who seems to want to explode out of his seat and sprint for the line of the ride again.

"To think we weren't," Holly responds, head falling onto the table. She has the start of a killer headache because of the coaster. Some tea would be great right now.

"You guys tired?" Ross asks. "I'm pumped. Let's go do something!"

Holly lifts her head up. "Can that something be grabbing something to drink?"

"Yeah, I feel like I'm going to puke."

Ross suddenly sobers, seeing the looks on Dan and Holly's faces. They really look genuinely sick. Poor guys.

"Yeah. Totally. You guys stay here, I'll get something for you guys." He gives Holly a peck on the forehead, then starts off. "Don't puke."

Ross is a few steps away from the table before he feels his arm being grabbed. He turns. It's Dan grabbing him, an expectant look on his face. "Well?"

Ross rolls his eyes, then steps back to give Dan a peck too. Dan lets go, a smile on his face. 

"Better."


	9. Suzy to the Rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @lovelyflowerqueen on tumblr: barry gets a papercut and suzy helped him out.

Today was a paperwork kind of day.

Well, more like paperwork kind of night.

Okay, it was like three in the morning. Barry and Suzy were hanging back today to get some paperwork done since Jack wasn't in the office. Poor guy fell down with a fever and had to stay home. 

Barry didn't mind doing all the work, but damn, there was a lot of it. It would be hours before he or Suzy could go home. Tax statements and bills and fan letters. Just paper upon paper. Piles of it. Barry had seen the huge garbage bags in the corner of Jack's office, but he never imagined that this was what they contained. This was Jack's job? Barry had it easy compared to this.

He had been handling paper all night long. He stuck his headphones on so he could listen to music while he worked, since he and Suzy were too tired to converse anyway. 

Paper. Paper. Paper. So much paper. So much Times New Roman. So many staples. It wouldn't be a surprise if Barry happened to accidentally--

"Shit!" Barry exclaimed as he dropped the forms he was holding. He held his hand over the floor so the blood wouldn't get on the paper. Just as he pondered how lucky he was to have not gotten a paper cut yet, he fucked up and got one anyway.

It was a bad one too. Not just a cut, but a full on slice right on the pad of his finger. It was a bleeder, drops falling freely from the cut. Barry stuck his finger in his mouth, sucking on it.

"Suzy?" Barry called, taking his headphones off with his free hand. "Do we have any band aids?"

Suzy looked up from her perch on the couch. When she saw what happened, she went completely Mom-Mode.

"Shit Barry, what happened? Are you okay? Does it sting?" She rushed over to Barry and tried to touch the cut. When she did, Barry jerked his hand back with a hiss.

"Yeah, it does actually."

Suzy just positioned Barry back in his seat. "Okay, you just sit there and I'll be right back."

Barry sucked on his finger again. "It's just a paper cut Suzy, I'm gonna be okay."

Suzy just waved a dismissive hand as she walked off. Barry sat in his chair as he waited for her to come back, feeling more like a vampire with every passing second. Man this fucker was bleeding like hell. It really burned too. 

"Okay, heeeere we go." Suzy returned with some some paper towels, Band-Aids and...was that a bottle of Peroxide? Since when have they had that, Barry wondered.

"Really Suzy, I just need--"

"Shh!" Suzy demanded. "Hold your hand out."

Barry did so, blood collecting in the cut again already. Suzy opened the bottle of Peroxide, pouring a capful on a piece of paper towel. She then pressed it on the cut. Barry felt a sharp sting in his finger, but did his best to remain still. Then Suzy wrapped a bandage around his finger, and he was good as new.

"Wow Suzy," Barry joked, "You should be a nurse with how you treated me."

Suzy just rolled her eyes, giving Barry a pat on the head. "I only treat people I love."


	10. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @sweetiefiend on tumblr: dan confesses to arin when it's too late

"Oh, my Arin. My dear friend. I love you. I love you more than I ever let you realize. 

"I love you. I love you so much. You were so much more to me than a friend. Since the day we met, I couldn't take my eyes off of you. You were...I don't know what you were. But from the second I saw you, I knew. 

"We had amazing chemistry from the beginning. Jokes bouncing back and forth between us with ease. Laughs echoing against the walls like they owned the room. It was always a treat to do things with you. Go places with you. Hang out together.

"I never dreamed that you felt the same way about me that I did about you. After all, you were married. You had, still have, a wonderful wife whom I also love very dearly. I couldn't let my emotions get in the way of your lifelong bond. So I stayed quiet. I admired you from a distance and kept my urges to myself. I sat down day after day and quietly envied your relationship. I was never angry or jealous of Suzy. I was happy for both of you. You two obviously had a connection. Every time you kissed her, or expressed your love for her, I never felt betrayed, annoyed, or angry. It was just life. Your life. Her life. And I was the friend. And I was okay with that. 

"And yet, I would often ask myself what us would look like. What we would look like. What would happen if we kissed. If we touched. If we made love. Futile dreams, but that never stopped me. I would think these things sitting right next to you sometimes. You'd ask me what I was thinking about with such a dreamy look on my face. And I'd lie. I'd always lie. You never knew I'd be lying, how could you? 

"Actions. You can fake them, hide them, downplay them, resist them. But thoughts, thoughts are the only raw reality. You can't fake a thought. I couldn't fake my thoughts about you. And they were all about you. Us. We. Together. Happily. 

"I've probably ruined everything by confessing all of this to you. But sometimes, thoughts are too loud to keep to yourself. I needed you to know. Everyone, I want everyone to know. I love you. I love you the way you love Suzy. I love you the way I've loved every person I've dated. More than that. 

"But...It's too late for that now. There can't be an us. There can't be a you and Suzy. Not anymore. Because it's over. You're over. And I'm sorry. And I love you."

Dan can't take his eyes off the ground as he steps down from the podium. He can feel the burn of Suzy's eyes on the back of his neck as he turns around to face the coffin. He lets his hand rest on it for only a second. The wood is cold. The wreath of flowers is big. The white flowers are already wilting, petals falling inward just a little, brown topping the edges. 

Dan starts back to his seat, skin feeling too tight for his body. The suit is stifling. He can't sit. He doesn't. 

He walks right down the isle of chairs, passing red cheeks and puffy faces and a shocked pair of brown eyes and black hair and blonde streak. He walks and doesn't know where he's going, feeling tears burning in the back of his eyes.


	11. Simplicity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by anon on tumblr: pet play SFW

It was a fluffy day. 

The sky was an almost pastel blue. The sun shone in the sky like a Christmas ornament, and the clouds were scattered around the sky looking like cotton candy. It was such a calm day. Even the normal bustle of L.A. had slowed down to a gentle hum. It was just a nice day. Maybe people were choosing to walk instead of take cars. Maybe more people were taking time at the parks surrounding the city. Maybe some were just enjoying time alone, inside the comfort of their own houses.

Brian and Dan were two of the people who decided to do the latter. It was a nice day, sure, but the sun was nothing compared to the warmth he was receiving by being held, almost like a lap dog (a very large lap dog), by Brian. Dan may top him by a good few inches, but that didn't stop either of them. Dan curled up as much as he could while still being comfortable, and just relaxed against Brian, letting his mind clear.

And how could he not feel calm, laying like this? Dan sitting there with his eyes shut and Brian petting his hair. Running his fingernails lightly down Dan's arm. It was the simplicity of the gestures that made Dan feel at ease. All the touches were soft, gentle. There were no demands, no play, not yet. Right now, it was just the plainness of the day. The ease of the cuddling. The beating of Brian's heart.

It was a great break from all the hustle of his everyday life. Dan barely ever had free time to himself, let alone with Brian. They both had the day off today. So they spent it all together. And this is where is ended, winding down with some good old fashioned snuggling.

"How do you feel?" Brian asked, still continuing to run his hands in and out of Dan's hair. 

"Mm..good," Dan replied. His eyes were closed still, his mind was no longer running like it always was. It was sitting, calmly. Happily. 

"That's good," Brian said.

"Yeah."

There was a silence for a few seconds. A comfortable one, just a lull in conversation.

"You've been good today," Brian said. He ran his hand down the length of Dan's arm again. "A very good boy."

"I hope so." Dan looked up at Brian. "You aren't going to punish me are you?"

Brian laughed a small laugh. "No, I only do that when you're naughty."

Dan gave a smirk. "Don't threaten me with a good time."


	12. More than Theoretical Physics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @madelinenotmadeline on tumblr: dimensions get scrambled, and the one they landed in...dan and arin dont know each other????

"So how exactly did this happen?" The other Arin asked.

Arin looked at his twin, shrugging. "I think someone got into more than 'theoretical' physics this time. He fucking proved the multiverse theory."

Dan hugged himself, obviously uncomfortable being in the presence of a carbon copy of himself and his best friend. "So we're all stuck here forever?"

The other Dan crossed his arms, eyeing Dan up and down. His face was critical, not quite in-tuned to the pending situation. "Is that really what I look like?"

Dan glared at him. "Can we focus on getting me an Arin home instead of what I look like?"

Arin nodded. "Yeah. Let's do that."

The other Arin put a hand up. "Woah, what's with the let's? I'M going back home. This guy--" --he tossed a thumb at the other Dan-- "--is going back home. And we're getting on with our lives. This whole....dimension scrambler thing is too weird to believe. I'll probably wake up any second now from this obvious dream I'm having."

Arin sighed heavily, linking arms with Dan. "Fine, then we'll find Brian ourselves." Dan nodded in agreement.

The other Dan gave a weird look. "Who the hell is Brian?"

~

The Brian in question was of Dan and Arin's universe. The universe where Game Grumps existed and so did NSP and everything like that. That was Brian. And that Brian fucked up. Big time.

A few years ago, Brian had moved to England to pursue his career in academia. To everyone's knowledge, he taught as a professor for some time, acquiring his PhD along the way. But what everyone didn't know, was that Brian was working on a secret project all on his own. If anyone found out, they'd think him a maniac, so he kept it on the down-low. He worked on it only in the late hours of the night, when no one could sneak up on him and find out what he was doing.

He was trying to create a device that allowed space and time to open itself up to the world, letting people from other dimensions and times to interact with one another freely. It was a crazy, random, completely obtuse idea, Brian knew this. But he had to try. He had to try for the sake of his own sanity.

He had dedicated years to the machine. He spent a third of his life working it. And he nearly completed it too. Completed it out of spite for himself. Every time he looked at a schematic, or screwed a screw, or shopped for a new part, he said to himself, "This is nuts. I'm so stupid. This will never work." He had to prove himself wrong. Success is the best revenge, he told himself. So every time he doubted himself, he worked harder, researched faster, built bigger. 

One day, however, he got a call from Dan saying that NSP was gaining popularity, and to come back home. Brian hated to abandon all his hard work. But he had to give it up in favor of being part of a musical duo. He brought the machine home, hid it well, and never touched it again.

Until.

One fateful day, Brian was suddenly hit with a new vigor. An idea. He went down on his old machine, knowing exactly what he needed to do to fix it. He had gone mad, surely. Or so he thought. 

One night, when Brian wiped the sweat off his brow and the oil off his hands, he stared at his completed machine. In all its shining glory it stood, waiting to be used. And with a press of a button, all of a sudden..

The dimensions scrambled. 

Arin and Dan ended up in an unfamiliar dimension with versions of themselves that didn't seem to know each other. The other Dan, of the dimension the original duo landed in, didn't know who Arin was. And vice versa. Game Grumps was never established. NSP was never formed. Arin was a freelance animator living from paycheck to paycheck, and Dan became the head of an advertising company. Neither were happy, it seemed. Both wanted something more. But they were stuck in the mud.

You would probably guess that when the other Dan and the other Arin met the guys from the Game Grumps universe, things didn't exactly make a lot of sense.

Guess again.

The Arin of the freelancer universe didn't seem to care about Dan and Arin's existence. He immediately leapt to the conclusion that he was dreaming and tried to go home. The other Dan didn't seem too perturbed either. He actually started to ponder how to turn this experience into a killer car ad. The only people concerned about fixing the dimension seemed to only be Dan and Arin. The original Dan and Arin. The ones who knew each other. Who actually needed to get home.

They went off to try and find Brian. Sadly, their only chance was the Brian of the current universe they were stuck in. Possibilities that this Brian was also working on a dimension scrambler were thin, almost nonexistent, but he was a chance.

~ 

A knock on the door stirred Brian from his sleep. He had chosen to spend a day alone, not working. He spent most of the day asleep, but he woke after the knock.

He went to the door, rubbing his eyes and smoothing out his pajama shirt. He opened the door and saw two guys standing there, obviously disheveled. They both looked exhausted, like they had just ran a marathon and then rolled around in dirt.

"Can I help you?" Brian asked. The two men stumbled inside the doorway without saying anything. Brian was confused, but these guys obviously needed some help. They didn't seem like the guys who were here to rob him. If anything, they looked like you could knock them over with a poke to the forehead.

"Brian," one of them said. "We need your help." He was tall, lanky, with huge hair and brown eyes. He flopped down on the couch, where Brian had been previously napping.

"Yes, we do," the other guy said. He had long, straighter hair with a single blonde streak in it. He stood uncomfortably in the middle of Brian's living room, shifting from foot to foot.

Brian closed his door, locking it like habit. "Is...there some way for me to get you guys help or...?" He stopped. "Wait, how do you know my name?"

The man sitting pushed himself into a straighter position. "We're from a dimension where we all know each other."

The guy standing nodded. "Have you been working on anything that could, perhaps, open up different dimensions? Like our Brian did?"

Brian's eyes widened, and he ran over to the window. He looked out, then slammed the curtains together. He turned. "How do you know about that?" 

The man sitting spoke up. "Because our Brian did the same thing. And that's why we're here. Can we use your dimension thingy to get back home?"

Brian hesitated. How could he trust these guys? One of them looked like he never showered, and the other looked like a stoner. How could he know if these guys were genuine?

Though, they did know about his machine, that was no coincidence. And if they knew about it, then they had to have been from a different dimension. Which means...

It actually worked!

"It's not fully proved safe," Brian said. "But you both made it here in one piece, meaning that your Brian did it right. Let's hope I did the same." He waved a hand, starting for the basement. "Follow me."  
~ 

The machine stood in the dim light, brooding and intimidating. 

Brian smiled at it like it were an old friend. "Here it is," he said with a grand gesture.

Dan and Arin stared it. "It's creepy," Arin said. Dan nodded.

"Cool as fuck though." Dan looked at Brian. "Is it gonna work?"

"What's your dimension?"

Arin cocked an eyebrow. "Earth."

"C-137, got it." Brian punched in a few numbers into a panel on the machine. A door opened then, seeming to beckon the two towards it.

Arin and Dan looked eat each other. Dan shrugged.

"Here goes nothing."


	13. Editing Can be a Bitch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @lovelyflowerqueen on tumblr: rubberdoop fluff

Barry opened up Twitter, logging into the Game Grumps twitter account. He opened a new tweet and started typing angrily. 'Sorry guys, the audio was lost on the last episode! Don't worry, we'll get something up very soon!'

Aaaaaand...post. 

Ugh.

Barry went to work, searching through footage to see if there was something they could post in place of it. An animation maybe? A grumpcade? Something??

But nothing was saved. Today was a new recording day, and that episode was the last of what he had until Arin and Dan were finished recording the new session. Eight hours from now. There was nothing he could do but wait until one to release the Steam Train episode for the day. Boy, the fans would be pissed. Not like he wasn't already pissed at himself. The one fucking time he decided, 'eh, everything is usually fine I don't have to watch through the episode this time', the audio was completely gone. Without a trace! It was nowhere! No one could find it. Not him, not Kevin or Vernon or anyone. And it was his fault, Barry knew this. 

He felt like a slug, sitting in his chair, knowing he had fucked up so badly. Ten extra minutes to run through the episode wouldn't have hurt anything. He was lazy, and made a lazy mistake. 'God', he thought as he slumped back in his chair, 'I'm such an idiot'.

"Hey Barry, what's wrong?" Ross stopped at Barry's desk. He was heading back to his own after a quick snack break, but he noticed the dissatisfied look on Barry's face as he passed. 

Barry lazily looked at Ross, then swiveled in his chair to face his computer once again. He didn't much feel like talking right now. Ross wasn't giving up, however. He wanted to know what was up. Barry looked down, Ross couldn't ignore that. 

"Bear?" Ross asked. He stepped closer and turned Barry's chair around himself. 

"What?" Barry purposely avoided making eye contact with Ross. He didn't want to have to explain his stupidity to everyone else. 

Ross' phone chimed, and he saw the notification from the Game Grumps twitter. 'Sorry guys, the audio was lost on the last episode! Don't worry, we'll get something up very soon!' 

Ross' face was one of sympathy when he slid his phone back into his pocket. Barry knew that Ross had seen. 

"I messed up the editing," he said. "All the audio is gone." Barry turned around in his chair again, putting his headphones on.

Ross took the headphones off his head and turned the chair around again. "Hey," he said. He ruffled Barry's hair. "It's fine. It is. Things get messed up sometimes."

"Not like this. Not the entire audio clip just disappearing." 

Ross bent down so he and Barry were at eye level. He ran his hands down Barry's arms and held his hands when he found them. "It's a mistake. One rift in the show and that's it. It's happened before."

Barry sighed, a small smile forming on his face. He knew Ross was only trying to help.

"Come here," he said. Barry motioned, and Ross stood up and slid into Barry's lap. He was small enough to fit. Ross wrapped one arm around his neck, and the other played with the buttons on Barry's shirt. 

"Thanks for helping me feel less like an idiot," Barry said. Ross leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. 

"No problem Bear."


	14. On the Radio

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @thatmessyfanaccount on tumblr: wanted happy grumps! I kinda ran with this one, so I hope you like it.

It was a quiet night. Recording ran long today with Dan and Arin, and Brian needed a ride home because of the late hour. He had planned to walk home, as he had walked to work, but at 2:30 in the morning, Dan said no way. L.A. was already unpredictable during the day, there was no telling what the night would bring. Brian was appreciative, he was exhausted anyway. Rachel was probably already asleep anyway, and he didn't want to wake her up. 

Arin was driving, having to go a little out of his way to drop both Brian and Dan off before going to his own home, but he didn't mind. 

No one was talking to anyone during the ride. The soft humming of music from the radio was the only sound inside the car. It was some obscure station, playing songs the three of them had never heard before. The songs were way too upbeat for being two in the morning, but the volume was low. 

Dan was in the passenger seat, head resting against the window, eyes closed. His arms were crossed, almost hugging himself because of the cold night weather. He wasn't asleep, the bouncing of the car assured that. But he was just too tired to keep his eyes open. The day had taken a toll on him. He had been writing lyrics with Brian, then he went over to the studio to record some of a song they actually completed, and then he had to come back to record with Arin. They had to record a whole bunch of shit because Arin was preparing for a trip with Suzy, and Dan suffered the brunt of the work. Poor guy was beat. He needed a rest.

Brian was in the back seat, behind Arin. The glow from the back suggested that he was on his phone, probably scrolling through Twitter or something. He was quiet as well, though every now and then he would chuckle for just a second. 

Brian had worked himself down to the bone this past week. Nonstop music writing. And then he had to go home and take care of a rowdy toddler. He must've been as tired as Dan was. Though he was really good at not letting it show.

Arin dropped Brian off at his house, and he waved a goodbye before going inside, probably to collapse on his bed and fall into a well deserved sleep.

Arin then started for Dan's house. It was a new place he just moved into. His sleep deprived brain almost set a course for Barry's place, where Danny used to stay, but he made sure to go to the new place.

Arin glanced over to Dan as he drove. Dan was still resting, but he had shifted when Brian left. His head was resting back against the head of the seat now. His mouth was hanging slightly open now. He seemed like he was fully asleep now. 

After a few quiet minutes of listening to the music on the radio, Arin pulled into the driveway of Dan's house. He put the car in park and sat for a second, stretching his arms and yawning. It was almost three now. Suzy must be worried. 

"Hey Dan, Dan, wake up." Arin shook Dan's shoulder a little bit, stirring him from his sleep. Dan woke up slowly, rubbing his eyes and yawning as well. 

"Are we here?" He asked. Arin nodded.

"Yeah, your house." Dan looked through the windshield, squinting to try and see his house. The night was dark, with nothing but the porch light to illuminate the area.

"Thanks man, I appreciate you driving me home," Dan said, unbuckling. "You want gas money?"

Arin scoffed. "Because I'm desperate for ten bucks, right? It's fine dude."

Dan smiled, giving a small salute before opening the passenger door. 

Arin didn't start the car back up just yet. He watched Dan walk up his sidewalk, just to make sure he got inside. A habit his picked up from his parents when they would drop him off at school. 

He stayed there and listened to the low music coming out of the radio as Dan fumbled around for his keys. The song was a simple beat, with a man singing in a low, steady voice about....

Minecraft?

Arin looked at the radio, and reached down to turn up the volume. That song seemed weirdly familiar. When he turned it up, he heard himself singing? What? That's impossible.

'....that all of this beauty, can fill me with such glee. Look at this tall tree, it's nature's majesty-'

Arin's eyes widened and he felt his heart physically skip a beat. No way. No fucking way.

He opened his own door. "Dan!" He yelled. Dan had his key in the lock, almost through the door when he heard Arin calling him. Arin waved him over frantically. "Dan! Come here come here come here!"

Dan's eyebrows furrowed, and he speed walked to Arin. "What's wrong?"

Arin turned the volume of the radio up even more, so Dan could hear. A huge grin was on his face. "Dan that's fucking us! That's us! That's Starbomb dude!"

Dan listened for a few seconds before he heard his own voice come on the radio. His face lit up like a Christmas tree. "No fucking way!" He practically screamed. "You're fucking with me!"

"Why would I be fucking with you!?" Arin said, scrambling to find his phone and dial Brian. There were five rings before a groggy Brian picked up the phone. Arin put it on speaker.

"Brian! Listen to what's on the radio! Listen!" Arin yelled happily into the phone, holding it next to the speaker. There was a few seconds before Brian responded. 

"Are you serious? That's on the radio right now?" Brian asked. 

"Brian, that's on the radio right now!" Arin said. "We're all on the radio!"

"This is fucking awesome!" Dan said, grabbing Arin in a tight hug. He hugged back, borderline squealing like a chipmunk at the song on the radio. They made it on the radio. 

"I can't believe it," Brian said. 

"Believe it! It's fucking happening! We're on the radio!" Dan had the biggest smile on his face as he looked at the radio. Arin turned the song up as loud as he could, wanting to wake the whole world up if he could. 

They all three listened to the song until its end, huge smiles on Dan and Arin and probably Brian's faces. When it ended, the radio announcer came on.

"And that was a song called 'Minecraft is for Everyone' from the video game comedy band, Starbomb! You should check them out, let me tell you. They have some real talent I gotta say. And here we continue with our all night music with no interruptions. Up next is a song you'd probably sing to your high school sweetheart. Here we go."

And with that, another song started to play. For everyone else, it was just another random song on the radio. For the three, it was something so much more.

Arin sat back in his seat, staring at Dan, who was still standing next to him. He shook his head. 

"We made it on the radio Brian," Arin said into the phone.

"We got on the radio," Dan said. The realization just hit him. He was on the brink of tears standing there, hand over his mouth. 

"I guess we did guys." Brian's smile was easily heard through his voice. "Congratulations you guys."

"You too Brian, that song was 90% you," Arin said.

"Yeah. It was." Dan leaned down to be able to hear Brian better.

"While I'd love to take credit here, you guys were part of that song too. So we all deserve a congrats." There was a pause. "Wanna go out for a drink tomorrow?"

Arin and Dan looked at each other. Nodded. "Sure," Arin said. "This is a reason to celebrate."

"Nice. Goodnight guys."

"Night," Arin and Dan said at the same time.

Dan and Arin stayed there for a second after he hung up the phone. Arin felt almost breathless with all that excitement hitting him at once. 

Dan was the same way. He was almost crying. "I still can't believe that we got on the radio Arin. That was us. That was Starbomb."

Arin nodded. "Yeah, that was Starbomb. We did it."

Dan smiled wider, as if it were possible. "We did it. All three of us."


	15. Hot as Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by anon on tumblr: dan gets a lip ring and arin loves it.

Suffice to say, Arin and Dan didn't have the most cyclical work schedule. 

Most people would be up at, say, four or five in the morning, head to work, and come home at the same time each day. Not with these two. With these guys, it was whenever they could till however long they could last before passing out. 

Today had been a scattered day. Arin had seven thousand places to be and not enough time to record anything. And of course their AC broke so he had to stink himself up for two hours trying to fix it. So now here he and Dan were, sitting in the empty office at three in the morning, recording as much as he could before falling asleep on the spot.

Arin glanced at the timer, relieved that it was just seconds away from the ten minute mark. He couldn't help himself. He let out a sigh.

"Next time on Game Grumps, we--uh..."

"Arin will be more awake," Dan chimed in with a snicker. Arin nodded.

"Yes sir. I will. And Dan will give me a blowjob."  
"I didn't agree to that," Dan said.

"It's in your contract. 'All employees must give blowjobs if requested.'"

Dan laughed. "Well, can't argue with that."

Arin stretched his limbs as Dan reached over to write down the time. He looked over at the timer, scribbling down what it said. When he did, Arin noticed a slight glint. What was that?

"Hey Dan," he said, "what's that you got there?"  
Dan smirked. "Finally noticed? We've been sitting here for hours."

"Well what is it ya dingus?"

Dan turned, facing Arin fully now. And he saw. He saw the dark gray metal ring at the right corner of his lip.   
"Holy shit dude, you got a lip ring?" 

Dan nodded, reaching up to touch it as if to make sure it was still there. "Yep. Cool huh?"

"Hell yeah dude. It's..." Look at that thing, Arin thought. Look at him. It may have been such a small addition to his face, but the small accessory somehow added ten badass points. He looked like a rock star with it. He looked..

"It's hot. I'd kiss you with it."

Dan blinked. 

"Pardon?"

"Did I stutter."


	16. Ain't Having That Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by anon on tumblr: protective Arin

The temperature was dropping with the sunlight as Arin and Dan walked home from the movies. It was later than they expected, nearing one in the morning. They hadn't planned to stay so long; it just kind of happened. They'd been seeing a movie together, and they were completely enthralled by one of the trailers that showed before the movie started. Fortunately, the movie trailer that piqued their interest was already playing in the theatre, so after the first one finished, they went and saw the other one. Unfortunately, that put them two and a half hours back from when they were supposed to go home. No major consequences would come of this, except that maybe the people at home would get worried. 

The night air was cold against Arin's face, the breeze rolling off his bare arms, making him shiver. It was a nice wind though, a great contrast to the ever-lasting heat of California. Dan, however, seemed to be quaking in the cold even with his leather jacket protecting him. His hands were shoved in his pocket as he walked, letting out shaky breaths through his teeth.

"We should've saved that other movie for another day," Dan said. 

Arin nodded. "Maybe so. It's so late, Suze and Barry must be worried."

"To death," Dan added, "I wish our goddamn phones had longer lasting batteries or I would've called them."

"Same here."

Well, we aren't far, Arin thought, it'll be fine. 

 

He stared down at the sidewalk, letting his memory guide him and Dan home. But after a good ten seconds, he realized that he hadn't been hearing the sound of Dan's accompanying footsteps. Arin glanced to the side. He wasn't there. Arin turned around, and what he saw caused a scream to get caught in his throat.

Someone behind Dan held him in a tight grip, hand over his mouth, knife at his throat. Dan's eyes pleaded at him, terrified.

Arin started to step towards Dan, but he heard a voice stop him.

"No no no, not another step, " the voice said, "I want your money, not your life. But make a move, and I won't think twice."

A spike of anger planted itself in Arin's chest as he stared at the mask hiding this guy's face. Who was he to go around robbing people? Geeze, if the guy needed money, he could've asked and Arin would've given it to him. He wasn't hard up for the fifty in his wallet. 

But putting a knife to Dan's throat? Bringing a knife AT ALL? That was just a dick move. He wasn't getting away with this. Dan was not a toy someone could use whenever they pleased. 

Arin took a breath, holding his hands up. "Alright, alright. What do you want?"

The man motioned with the knife. "Slide your wallet over and I'll let your friend go." Dan struggled under his hand, and the man only held tighter. Dan clenched his eyes shut. He was trembling.

Arin nodded, hand slowly reaching into his pocket. "It's in my hand. Just, slide it over?" His hand closed around his wallet in a death grip. He'd give him his wallet alright. 

The knife wielder nodded. "Nice and easy and then you and your boyfriend can go home." Arin couldn't help but smirk. That was funny. 

Arin pulled the wallet out of his pocket slowly, holding it up and away from him purposely. The robber moved his head along with Arin's motion, as if he were a dog being guided by a treat. Once his head was in full view, Arin whipped the wallet at him. It hit him smack dab in the middle of his face with the desired effect. The man yelled a curse and released Dan from his grip. Arin yanked Dan towards him by the arm out of the way and then jumped forward, grabbing the attacker by the hood of his jacket and kneeing him in the stomach. He doubled over, groaning. Arin kicked the knife away, scooped up his wallet and started to run, Dan not far behind.

When they were finally far enough away for comfort, Arin stopped, giving Dan a hug tight enough to break his ribs. 

"Are you okay? Did he cut you?" Arin asked, inspecting Dan up and down. Dan affirmed more than once that, yes, I'm okay Arin, I'm okay, he didn't hurt me, just scared me, it's okay.

"You were bad ass back there," Dan commented once they were in the door. "You kicked his ass."

Arin chuckled. "He was gonna hurt you. No way that was gonna fly." 

"Well, thank you, I appreciate it."

Arin paused, a sly smile spreading on his face. "Does that mean I get that BJ now?"

"Aaaaaaaand you've ruined the moment."


	17. Jack is a Fanboy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack is a nervous cinnamon roll and arin is there to help. Septiraptor.

Oh, Jasus.

After months of what Jack thought were empty promises, here he was, at the grump office, in the grump room, on the grump couch, staring at the grump tv and the grump timer that will time him for ten minutes with the grumps. Probably more, actually. His nerves have reduced him to biting on his fingernails as he waited on Arin and Barry to get in here. They said he could just wait out there with them, but Jack insisted on coming inside and trying to compose himself first.

Ah, fuck.

What would he say? What if he made a weird and obscure joke that nobody laughs at? What if he made a dark joke that's too dark? What if he said something that offends somebody and then they can't even air the episode and then all the grumps hate him forever and he'll never ever be friends with them and then--?

"Ow!" Jack exclaimed. He pulled his hand away from his mouth, and he found a little dot of blood where the tip of his fingernail used to be. He needed to keep his hands somewhere out of reach next time he starts to spiral. Maybe he should pin them under his ass.

Jack actually started to do just this, but quickly brought them into his lap once more when he heard the door opening behind him. On instinct, he ran a hand through his hair and smoothed out the wrinkles in his shirt, while simultaneously reminding himself, _They know you. They like you. You've been here before. Just play it cool._

Arin plopped down next to Jack, even though there was a perfectly empty cushion two spots away from him. He felt their legs touching. 

_Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck._

"Barry's coming," Arin mentioned as he reached for the pad and pen. He scribbled down the game they were playing, and circled his and Barry's grump head at the top to indicate who was playing. Then he paused. "What should I put since you're here? Should I just like, draw you in the corner?"

_Make sure you get my good side,_ he wanted to say. Something stopped him. "If you want."

Arin nodded, and proceeded to doodle a small grump head in the shape of Jack: complete with grumpy blue eyes and a floofy puff of hair on the top. "Is that good?"  
_You drew the mouth too small. Remember? I'm the loud one._ "It's good, yeah."

Arin tossed the pad on the table in front of them, then leaned back. He casually threw an arm around Jack's shoulder, which just about made him jump out of his pants.

"You know," Arin said, "you don't need to be so nervous. Everyone adores you here. Just be yourself."

Jack let out a deep breath, a sudden weight slowly coming off his shoulders. It wasn't completely gone, but he felt a tad better. Arin said he was adored.

"I'm glad you got to spare some time for me." Arin leaned his head on Jack's shoulder, and Jack honestly couldn't help but smile. This guy. He scoots down a little bit so Arin is more comfortable? "It's been like forever since you've been here."

"Haven't really had a chance. Life's been crazy."

Arin sighed, contented. "Sure has. But good. Crazy is good."

There was a lull between them. But not an awkward one. 

"I like you more when you're yourself, Jack," commented Arin. A strange noise caught itself in Jack's throat for a reason he couldn't exactly pin. He chuckled.

"Well thanks. Even though myself is probably really annoying."

"Nah. You're loud. But loud is good. Gets you hyped up and shit. You're like a ball of everything that's awesome in the world."

Jack put a hand to his chest. "Well thank you."

"Now kiss!" exclaimed Barry, who apparently had been standing there for a second or two.

Arin didn't miss a beat. "Maybe later."


	18. AntiDark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anti gets secondhand drunk because Jack drinks himself silly on st paddys day. Dark to the rescue

Anti was sitting on the couch in a haze, staring ahead at the TV, which showed nothing but static. It reflected how he felt at the moment: static-y, not quite material. Not quite there.

His head was killing him, which almost made him cackle because he wasn't even technically alive. Didn't stop it from hurting though. He groaned, voice echoing against the walls and making itself back into his ears. It seemed to slam back into him, and he reached up to clutch his head. 

_"F͓̎ͨ̾̌ͭ̑ü̗̦̥̯̬̮̙ͅć̖̗̙͊̈́͛̔ͬ̚ḳͦͧ̆!̯̞͎̙͇͍̗̂͑̆͋̄̈́̏̚"_ Anti yelled. It was all he could say, because one syllable more and he'd be on the floor. He was already curled against himself on the couch, praying to whatevergod for this incessant pain to end before he straight up puked. Why, why, why was he still linked to that green idiot?? Why was his entire physical being reliant on that...that stupid irish... _Whatever his name is!_

This stupid alcohol. This annoying holiday! Anti would rather go back to three years ago when he didn't exist instead of this shit.

A hand on Anti's shoulder made him realize that his eyes had been shut tight. He opened them, but had to stare straight ahead because looking up would mean moving his head, and moving his head meant pain. All he could see was the tip of Dark's tie, tinted red against his white undershirt. His coat was unbuttoned. Of course HE could afford to drink: he'd been here longer, and had learned to tolerate it. Since Mark couldn't drink anymore, Dark often inebriated himself. He found it liberating. He never drank enough to subdue his rational thinking, he only drank enough to feel a little looser.

Motherfucker.

"I see that Jack has been drinking," Dark commented. He bent down so he was eye level with Anti. "It's St. Patrick's Day."

Despite his less-than-better judgement, Anti hissed out a reply. "Y̰͔̭͓͓͎͟ơ͈͔̖̥̘u̸̡̮͕̤̰̞̳͠ ̷̶̮̥͞ͅd̞͙̘͖̞̫̝̳ͅo̵̪̗̥̳̥̺ǹ͇̟͝'͏̧͍͇ţ͖̜̣͓̻́͞ ̤̝͕͍̱͜ͅf̸̀͏̭u̮̺̫c͏̭̪̗ķ̴͚̱͝i̛̻̙̲͎̼̘̬͢n̨̳͔̞̭͘ͅ'̥̘ ̵̛̲̥̰̟͜s͍̙͔̯͓͜͝a̶̸̺̰̖̥ͅy̵̧͕̻͙̱̗̠̯͉?͈̝͖̱͚̰͇̹" The sentence brought ringing to his ears, and he yelled in pain. Dark straightened.

"Should I do something to help?" he proposed. 

"Yes...please..." Anti whispered back.

With a nod, Dark left the room.

Well, what the hell could he do for Anti if he wasn't even in the room? The fuck was he going to get, a blanket? Oh, maybe some soup? Oh that'd be real helpful. Get the demon who can't even move some damn soup. Anti internally groaned. He swore, once he took over Jack's body, the first thing he was going to do was smash every bottle of whiskey, beer, WHATEVER, with his bare hands. Then he was going to use the glass to slit Jack's throat.

Can drink if you got a hole in your throat.

Why are you hitting yourself, why are you hitting yourself?

Why's there a hole in your throat, why's there a hole in your throat?

Anti was so drunk.

After literal minutes of laying there in a glitchy, pathetic ball, Anti hears the telltale sound of dress shoes clacking against wood flooring, and he knew Dark had come back. 

"I believe I've solved the problem."

"Where'd you go?" Anti asked. He instinctively winced, expecting pain to lace his head, but after a moment, nothing came. He dared to challenge himself; he moved in slow increments into a sitting position. Besides being slightly dizzy and a bit stiff, he felt fine. 

Dark buttoned his jacket up, fixed his hair. It had a nasty habit of parting to the left. "I simply visited Sean in his home."

"And..?"

"I'm quite sure he'll be asleep long enough to wean the alcohol out of his system, and by association, yours."

"Did you like...hit him?"

"Maybe."


End file.
